Natasha Holf
Perhaps you feel new to the dating scene, maybe you’re back at it from a long time out of the market or you might want to make your current date game more enjoyable– here’s two things you will want to consider the next time you go on a date!
#1 The Thing I Need Is: The Setting
This is definitely a MUST in every date, and most of us already do give some thought to this: Place. Time. Company. Boom, you got a date. But there could be a little more to it than that. It’s nice to feel accommodated and wanting to be surprised by the other, but I personally prefer to take the lead and pick such things myself, because there is A TON of stuff to think about!
A simple “where are we going?” can be broken down into: What are we going to do?
Are we eating, seeing a move, taking a walk, maybe horse riding on the beach? How well do we know each other? Do we feel comfortable in each other’s company? Maybe the place and time will help us be a little bit more ourselves or make us shy?
Am I overdressed, under-dressed or perfect with the outfit I surely thought about before this date thing? Do I/you really like the place or are we going because it’s hot right now? Are we here to have a good time or to get to know each other better?How are we getting there and back? Is there a backup plan or an escape route if things are going south?
And the list of thoughts goes on but from there, when you put some thought to it, almost any place can be a good one for a date. That also includes the time: not only day or night, but the time of the year can make or break what could have been a wonderful date.
#2 The Second Thing I Need: CONFIDENCE!
YAAAASSS GURLLL GO SLAY! Wait a second though. Confidence, unlike what you’ve seen in your average rom-com, does not necessarily mean being excessively forthright or going physical with your date first. Confidence can be shown in numerous ways: stand up or sit straight and relaxed.
You know you look at least gorgeous, and you have the eyes and ears of someone else all for yourself. Make eye-to-eye and eye-to-mouth contact every now and then. If you’re there for conversation, talk about your likes first, drama can wait. If your date is not familiar with where you’re going or what you’re doing, showing yourself as a natural there can help things smooth out. Showing interest in the other person and asking out-of-the-box questions is common advice, but – What about letting yourself express naturally when you disagree about something?
That will show your date you have a well established personality and are not desperately seeking validation. Even if you two don’t do well later, your date will come to respect that. Good things can happen when you are the confident version of you, who knows?
Just a little bit of my muttering… Natasha Holf
